roughly as in i can't quite tell why it was bad, or if it was bad, but if you looked at it... it was bad.

and i wanted to talk to emily.

and it's almost three in the morning.

and i'm still waiting to talk to emily.

i caught her, once, and she said she wanted to talk to me, so i need to call her back.

i just don't know how long to wait.

i've got a meeting tomorrow.

at 10.

in 7 hours.

i'll get up at least an hour before i need to be there, so that's 6 hours of sleep.

depending on when i get a hold of her.

and she's having a good day, i know she is. she's having fun right now. and that makes everything better, over here.

but it also makes me realize she's a hundred and thirty two states away from me.

it makes me realize that, should the time come when i really need her, really absolutely need her, i may not be able to have her there.