i was laying on my back and emily was straddling me. i was trying to talk to her about something, something relatively important enough for me to try to ignore the fact that there was this woman on me, trying to kiss me and distract me, but oh i couldn't let her distract me.

because even in my dreams i'm a fool, you see?

but, bless her, emily's strong minded.

so she unbuttoned by jeans. and unzipped them.

and i looked down at her hands and looked up at her face and completely lost my train of thought.

completely.

as i am apt to do when someone's sitting on me and methodically depantsing me. in or out of a dream.

and the look on her face, the way her weight was on my legs, her hand palm down on my stomach then moving between the gap where my zipper should be secured and fastened.

i woke up.

before anything happened.

but its still in my mind and in my memory and man.

saying i miss her is an understatement.

i get to talk to her on the phone. email her and write her letters.

but i can't get her weight.

i can't get her indention next to me in bed late at night.

i can't feel her hands press into my hair, grab my shoulder, press into my hips.

i miss her.