kim is completely insane.

i'm not saying that to get a laugh.

she said, today, that i didnt give her space yesterday.

all i did, yesterday, was give her the space she seemed to want. i quit my job at one point. i came back because keia, god bless her, keia ran after me and told me kim said i shouldnt quit.

i wasn't going to talk to her for a week because keia told me kim said not to. so i didnt talk to her. i stayed away from her part of the building.

kim talked to me.

a bunch of us went out bowling. kim went with us. i asked my sister if at any time i acted wrongly, didnt give kim her space.

my sister shrugged and shook her head.

i asked kim to tell me what the hell i did wrong. she said it doesnt matter. i said then why did you say that. she said it doesnt matter. i said fuck that, it matters, tell me.

said that i can't continue to do this. to try and work and be told everything is wrong.

she needed to tell me what i did wrong.

she said she wouldnt tell me when i was mad.

i said what the hell.

i told her, near the end of me yelling, i told her that she was going to wake up one day and realize i put up with more shit from her than i should have. and that i cant guarentee now that ill be there. that i would've done anything for her.

she couldnt look me in the eye for long. i noticed that, as i stood in the rain and she sat in her truck. she kept looking away.

i told keia that, later. i told her and she said that she's noticed that she doesn't ever look at me unless she's saying something to upset me.

and i've got all these ideas in my head about why she's acting like she does. that shes not over me like she claims she is. that this and that that, and i know more than half of what i'm thinking is right. just because i know her.

i know she's ignoring something huge, and i dont know for sure what it is.

and i also know i am a damn stubborn loser, and so i will call her in about ten minutes, aplogize for something i said, and try to get her to talk to me.

keia said to me, today, she said "if she came up to you right now and said i needed a hundred dollars, would you give it to her?" "if i had it, yes." "would she give it to you?" "probably not. no." "i noticed a long time ago it's been like that. but thats your nature, i know. you try to help everyone. but it's uneven." "i know. like how she won't ever go get me food."

but hell, this is making me stronger eh.