the first thing i said was "i'd rather it go to the supervisors."

because, well, these people have been at this job just as long as i have, and havent got a raise yet.

i think i upset my manager by saying that. she wants me to say "yes, i'll take it!" so she can say "why, then you have to work more hours!"

but instead i said "give it to someone else!" and she said "but thats not how it works!" and i said "i understand, but thats what i would like!" and she said "well, then they'll think i dont need an assitant manager and make ME work SEVENTY! HOURS! a WEEK!"

and instead of feeling immense pity, i said "i want them to have it."

and she said "well, i guess i have my answer." and hung up.

a lot of little things made me mad about that conversation. so i sat myself down and did a bunch of math. i figured out how many hours my manager would have to work, if i didnt take the money. an extra... six hours?

but if i took it, it'd be about 12 more hours for me.

i figured if i didnt get the salary, then thats a sixty cent raise for all the supervisors.

if i took it, and they passed out the raise i first got, that's a ten cent raise to the supervisors, plus an extra ten cents the company can keep.

i talked to kim about it, and she gave me an idea. if i get offered it again (which im pretty sure i will), i'll take it. the extra money i'll get, though, ill just divide out to the employees who deserved a raise a long time ago.

it'll only be about 14 dollars extra for them a paycheck, but that's something extra.

but this means my week will look like this:

sunday: busy from 11 to 6.

monday: busy from 10 to 430.

tuesday: busy from 11 to 12, if not later. today i got home about 2.

wednesday: busy from 10 to 5. then i drive an hour. busy from 6 to 12. then i'll get home around 1.

thursday: busy from... well, hell, this day would probably change a lot. it'd probably be me busy from 11 to 3, then i'd drive an hour, and be busy from 4 to 730.

friday: busy from 10 to 2, drive an hour, busy from 6 to 12.

saturday: busy from 11 to 6, a break, then busy from 10 to 12.

being busy means a bunch of things. i do some nonpaying work, and those times would have to change some, too.

and all this because the company won't give out raises. so i'm going to fuck with what they do give, and pass it on.

i had a big talk with kim today, about what she saw me doing as a "real" job. and she decided she can't see me having a real job other than managing some place.

i enjoy managing. i like being there for the employees. it's something im fairly damn decent at, when my heart's there.

i dont know. we shall see what will happen. maybe everyone will become great and everyone will get that raise they deserve.