she didnt know the real plans for lunch i had.

yesterday. yesterday i went to four different grocery stores trying to find all the ingredients.

i finally found everything.

so, today, when i picked her up, i was nervous that, after i asked "do you have any place in particular you want to eat?" she would say "why, yes."

and blow my plans out of the water.

but she said no.

so i grinned my grin and said good.

more background:

she was in my arms, sleepy, watching tv.

a commercial came on. for manwich. she said "that stuff is WONDERFUL!" and i laughed and laughed. cause she said this sleepy like.

she went on to talk about how she hasnt had it in forever.

present:

today, i took her to my house. walked her into the kitchen. had the manwich sitting out, waiting.

she laughed and did this twisting away move she does when she is suddenly shy.

but we cooked it. and she would look across at me, while we ate, and the look in her eyes.

it was open. and she was taking me in. studying me, learning me, taking me in.

so i would do my suddenly shy move.

later.

later as i was taking her home, much later, i asked her what her favorite part of the day was. she asked me, we were quiet a moment.

then she said "the manwich. that was gggrrreeeaat."

and i just got all pround and grinned and i am SUCH A LITTLE KID, if i wasnt driving right then i am sure i would have hung my head and kicked at a pebble saying gee willikers.