We will find ourselves in my bedroom. The lights will be off. The back of my knees will be pressed against the mattress.

She will unbutton my shirt and slide her hands under my undershirt, her nails sliding up my rib cage, and my breath will catch.

There will be another first time. There might be two, three more. There will be another first time until there reaches a point where I've found the woman who makes it the last first time.

I will make sure my hand is on her neck, in her hair, when I lower her down. I will take my time and take note of the way she smells and how she moves and her teeth then we will stay together.

The first last sleep over.

And I will wake late in the night, early morning, and she will still be sleeping.

And can you imagine that? Can you imagine that woman, that woman who has got to be so incredible and beautiful and smart and funny and passionate and aggressive and tender? And can you imagine knowing that I'm surrendering everything to her?

Can you imagine me cooking her dinner?

Dancing in the living room?

Driving out of state to the middle of nowhere for no reason other than to have a weekend away, alone?

Staying in and getting drunk and laughing?