i went with her family to a movie. sat between her stepdad and her.

the movie was good.

everything was good.

hell, earlier in the day she made me stop looking at her because it was getting to her.

it was a good day.

then we got home. and then she got cranky. and instead of being angry at her for it, i wanted to just shrug it off.

and because i didn't get angry, she got all... i don't know. she just felt like she should have been punished for what she did to me.

truth be told, i've been really pissed at people before for what she did to me.

i just wanted to shrug it off last night, though.

that, though, was apparently too nice and she's not used to people being nice, so it evolved into this teary, hard thing where i was starting to get angry and starting to say "is that what you want? do you want me to 'punish' you?"

and i almost got up and left.

to a degree, it's just that she's not used to dating someone like me.

to a degree, it's just that i want her to fucking trust me and be happy, instead of saying "what's happiness? just a momentary feeling."

i really like her. she smiles and i just get all captured in it. her teeth are perfect and eyes light up and she laughs loudly and she's great.

last night, after the movie, i was hungry, so i mentioned something to amy about stopping and picking something up to eat on the way home, she said okay.

then she started falling asleep in the car. she was kind of cranky then, too, so i knew she was really tired and what not.

so i took her directly home.

she woke up, mumbled "i thought you wanted to eat?"

said "you're tired, you should sleep."

my head was hurting. either from my contacts or, you know, not eating. who's to say, really.

then the whole mess where she left me in the dark and walked away happened.

i don't know.

i still haven't had anything to eat. i will, soon enough.