alas, i'm going to have to put out.

really, is there no end to this misery?

she goes to work and talks about me. they make fun of her because she's got this permanent grin on her face. i don't know, really, what she tells them, except that last night i opened the car door for her.

when i got in on my side she said "i got lectured about that today."

"about what?"

"about letting you open the car door. the girls said i should just let you do it, take it as a compliment."

"how'd this come up in conversation?"

"oh, i just told them how sweet you were, and used you opening doors as a way you show consideration."

and then she got all bashful.

"except i didn't... quite... say it that way. it was in that ball park. kind of."

i made her dinner last night, as she looked through my high school stuff and as i did laundry.

we had mexician.

she started to fall asleep, as we waited for my last load to dry, but before she was completely out she pulled me toward her, had me stretch out next to her and just hold her as she slept.

which i did, for half an hour, 40 minutes, until the clothes were done.

this afternoon we were at her place and her ex called, told her how they were falling in love with someone, and then got mad and yelled at her when she told them we had kissed.

i really don't like this ex, and next time they call i'm going to ask to talk to them.

it's bad enough that they're "falling in love" with this other person while telling their ex "if you're going to be dating someone, it should be me."

but it's crossing the line when it's someone who, you know, is dating me.

they had their chance and it didnt work out, i'm going to get mine, dammit.

i'm going to take her and her stepbrother out to an amusement park just because she got incredibly excited at the idea of it, which made her smile.

and man, her smile, the one that amazed me at first? the one that made me ask her out? you know, that smile?