i've been here ten minutes.

i want to leave.

it's all woe is me, pity me, pity me, kind of crap, so i'll spare you.

but, well, just this:

soon, my sister will know more about emily than i do. she'll be more up to date than me.

which just gives me another damn reason not to come back.

i think i've got a vague idea of why i'm supposed to stick around a few more years.

i think i'm supposed to be the parent of a kid. i mean, maybe not biologically, probably not biologically, but at least in spirit.

and probably that of a girl.

i mean, yeah, part of me could see having a fun time with a boy. teaching him to play ball like my dad taught me and such.

and i know, i damn well know that someone needs to raise up a couple of good guys to treat the women well. and i know i can teach them that respect.

but, i dont know, i think i'd have more fun teaching a little girl to play ball.

and i'd much rather raise a girl up to know, without doubt, that she's beautiful. it doesn't matter her size or whether or not she's got love handles or if her nose makes her face a little asymmetrical, she's beautiful.

i think i'd get more out of that.