if she was older i would dare say i would have a crush on her. but she's a little over a month older than my sister, so i dont.

deal is, i grew fond of her, missed her birthday. it was in january. realized i missed it this past weekend.

told i realized i missed it, and feel bad. she said yes, i had to make it up to her.

part of what i like about her is she's not shy, you see.

i wrote a letter to her.

more or less telling her i think damn highly of her, and that one of my highlights from last year was meeting her.

you know, your normal happy belated birthday letter.

gave it to my sister to give it to the kid, because yeah i wasnt going to see her today.

and the sister gave it to her, today.

BUT IM A NERVOUS GOSH DARN WRECK ABOUT IT.

its like ive written her a love note and i'm asking her to check yes or no to that infermal question:

do you like me?

hyuck hyuck.

i'd say i'd snap my suspenders at this point, BUT I ACTUALLY HAVE SUSPENDERS. THAT I WEAR.

so, of course, that means suspenders are not a sign of dorkiness.

i repeat, NOT a sign of dorkiness.

back to my story:

i'm nervous. and there's no reason for me to be.

i didnt ask her out. i didnt call her out for a fight behind the school at 3 pm. all i did is say hey, i think you're a good kid. happy belated birthday.

she didnt read the letter in front of my sister.

bah.

so. yeah. im just wanting to know how she responded. if it made her smile or anything.

i might see her tomorrow, i dont know.

BAH.