and all i can think of is you, in front of me.

i feel the edges of the letters.

my thumb caressing the length of the space bar.

i wont lie. i have wondered what you would look like stretched out, down in front of me.

i imagine the curves. hip to waist to the rise of your rib cage and the soft smooth curves.

i imagine your stomach stretched out from a back pushing up from many different feelings.

your pale skin and my lightly tanned hands.

both blemished and marred. both with aspects we are ashamed of.

but above all i imagine your neck.

your neck leading to your chin leading to those cheeks which get pink so easily.

i remember waiting for you outside of that bathroom. sitting on the floor, my back against the wall, my hands folded together in front of me, between my knees.

old women passed me and looked at me without meaning to look at me.

i remember thinking one day some lucky guy will wait for you like i waited for you. and when you walk out that door your eyes will search for him. and when you two connect, eyes or hands or lips or bare fingers, that smile you will give, that look in your eyes, those cheeks which will undoubtedly be more than pink, when you two connect, what a beauty you will be.

and then you walked out of the bathroom and i stood. you smiled. your cheeks a little more than pink.

and those cheeks which you dislike, which make you "rudy", i adored.

ah.

i hope one day you realize how lucky you could make someone. just realize the power in you, the beauty in you and without, the kindness in your touch.