i went to a reading tonight. four people, one of which i knew.

good things were read, good thoughts were thoughts, ideas were propositioned that i might have to concede to.

speaking of ideas, and i apologize for the abrupt change in subject... oh la la im being so civil and polite tonight. heh... yeah, but tonight i almost got into a discussion with this lady about religion. she was saying mormons and snake handlers and people who believe baptisms the only way to get into heaven were "far out there."

for the record, i do not promote nor demote any religion. i do not declare myself a follower of any faith. i believe in what i believe, and im still searching. but, yeah, thats another matter.

so people were talking with her, and i finally spoke up. i said but how can you and she said no im not going to discuss this i didnt want to discuss this. and then she left.

and that, my friends, is a sure way to disrespect the crayon. sit there and argue with me all you want, call me dirty names, belittle me if you feel you must, but never, and i say never, say your side of the arguement and not have the decency to at least acknowledge my reply.

i know im not the most versed in religions. i know, according to a whole shit load of people, that im going to hell. ive never been baptized, saved, reborn, never given the glory up to christ, never praised allah or thought about my dharma.

and, yet, for the life of me, i cant see how anyone can say your belief is far out. your belief is flat out wrong.

a lot of people mistake me as having religion. as being christian. i dont take it as an insult. not a lot of the times. why do they think of me as this?

im kind, considerate, im not overbearing, judgemental (a lot of the times im not. sometimes i am), im accepting. i dont drink, do drugs, use foul language... heh, alright, i do use foul language, its just that people dont hear it, or when they do, its a damn shock to em. family is important to me.

and i hang out with christians. i also hang out with muslims, hindus, atheists, agnostics, mormons, southern baptists, people who once called themselves satanists.

but because i hang out with christians i am associated with them. i am said im one. and then people learn.

frankly, i dont care if you think im going to hell because i havent been saved. im going to hell for a lot of other reasons, not just because i wasnt reborn. it flatters me you worry about my eternal soul, but listen:

if it comes down to it, if it comes down to her being right, if it comes down to her saying my beliefs are far out and hence wrong and hence good bye eternal life, love, salvation.

then i say goodbye.

i am happy. i make others happy. i make them believe. i dont kill, maim, defile, commit adultery, get drunk off my ass.

in a hell of a lot of circles i would be a half decent type of kid.

and so there it sits.

and to think, originally i was thinking of art.