but i figured i'd write up a little entry for yall.

i work tomorrow. then i, i think, am going down to the parents. to the hospital. to see friends. to waste another weekend and curse myself in the morning.

the thing i love most about playing pool is the silence you can get with some people. you just step up, around, line the shot, shoot. if its good youll hear a low mumble of appreciation, maybe a "nice" tossed out.

im not a loud person. never have been. never will be.

i felt my arm muscle sort of roll tonight as i played pool.

by the by, im horrible in pool.

i slam the wall with my head every now and then, thinking i let the girl get to boston with this unresolved. so we're going to resolve it so damn separated that i wont feel right.

my eyes are heavy.

i need to be up in 7 hours.

im slowly killing myself, yall, what with this lack of sleep and double work and all the other crap im putting on my shoulders.

dont get me wrong, though, i am having a great time. i saw a butterfly today. i saw a hummingbird yesterday. ive had some of the best food in my life in this town. ive seen a weird ass bowling alley. ive become close enough to jen that i feel alright sleeping on her bed when shes not there.

oh, which, i spose, leads me to this: she feels comfortable enough around me to change.

not in front of me, mind you, but behind my back. still, in the same room.

she knows as soon as she starts up i avert my eyes. i stare at my shoes or pull down my hat. i can hear her behind me, moving around, putting on a shirt and stuff for aerobics and yeah, im glad we're getting that kind of open friendship, but man, that just so makes me feel like im walking in peeping on her.

eh. crazy morals and standards of living. i tell you what.

i didnt eat outside to see the crane. i forgot about it.

my minds all over the place these days, but located in one general area.