Kim from five years ago.

It's weird because, at one time, I thought she was the world. I was young and naive and thought man, this is going to last forever.

It killed me when it didn't. She said some horrible things, I became mean. I lost a good part of myself after that.

But if it had lasted I would have never been with Emily. Emily. Emily showed me what a good relationship could be like.

And I would never have been with Amy. Which might have been a huge plus, because Amy was horrible for me. But Amy also made me grow up. I had to be responsible and mature and figure out what exactly I want from my girlfriend.

And I wouldn't be with Kelly. After Kim and I broke up a part of me changed. Changed or became hidden or went away, something. The part that made me carefree and weird and magical. Because I am magic, mofos, I am.

And it's been a long time coming, but with Kelly, with Kelly I'm more myself than I have been years. I sing in crowded grocery stores to her. I make people laugh like there's no tomorrow and I cook hella good because I have someone who is there to actually eat it. And then make out with me.

I really wish I could go back in time and tell myself that I should love Kim as much as possible for as long as it lasted. She was and is an amazing, beautiful woman.

And I wish I could tell myself that when it was over to let it go. I might not ever see her naked again, but when I really needed someone, she's always always been there. I would tell myself it all works out for the best.